Confessional Preface

Hello, Mimi's here. My confession starts in 3, 2, ....

Thursday, October 24, 2013

The Moment I Decided To Become an Adult, that's When I Regret It

It has been a while since I wrote anything in here. My Sept-October post track are almost bare. To tell you the truth, I been emotionally frustrated using this two social site: Facebook and Blogger. I was BORED by it. For me, Facebook is getting dull and lame everyday while Blogger, well I haven't get much to write so, there goes my reason.

Anyway, that's not why I came here. I wanna to talk about my life. I haven't got the chance lately since there particularly no one I could really talk to. This internship thing, is slowly killing me.

Two months already passed, another two to go. Honestly, I can't wait to get back to UKM. I'm dying to see my friends again, to talk to them, cracking some lame jokes and get away with it. Yup, that's the kind of familiarity that I am beginning to miss. And who could blame me? I hardly get any of that in here. None of my old friends is around any more. Whatever left is just me; in this old town where I was born and raised. And that reminds me of something. Growing-up.

I used to pester my dad, saying that if I could work then I don't have to ask money from him. He always laugh and tells me that earning money is a hard thing to do. He been doing it since he's seventeen, and he never likes it. Then, I ask him if I could drive a car. The usual, he would said: No. I would scorned.  I thought he just do that to mess around with me. I thought maybe, he's just being too protective. Then, reality strikes me.

 I was forced to drive one day, of his car. Well, without his permission, of course. He was worried sick, but I tell him I was fine. Still, he didn't believe me. Almost didn't talk to me for few days but I poke him around, making sure that he still responds to me. I know he was really worried and secretly mad. The funny thing is, I was worried too. Only we were worried about different things. He probably worried about the safety of his only daughter and his car, while I was worried... whether am I growing-up too fast by doing this?

Sure, a twenty-one year old kid driving a car wasn't any shocker if you think about it. That's normal. But, some part of me is denying that fact. As if, I wasn't ready to move the safety veil that my father had laid upon me in this past few years. He already plan on buying me a car (no shocker there, already planned that ages ago), yet I feel - I am just not ready yet to grow up and start driving on my own even if I know how and really want to. A part of me is scared if the connection that I had with my dad, will be gone once I learn to be independent. I am scared if he would stop to care when that happens. As much as my conscience is clear about becoming an adult, I am not that ready to become one just yet.

Okay, I guess now that I had let go what I been keeping in my head - I better make a move. Got a long day ahead of me tomorrow. Long day of work. Thank you for stopping by and reading this. Hope you guys enjoy this latest post.

Mimi says: Time to grow up

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